How To Stop Deep Disgusting Desires From Getting In The Way Of Buying
Falling into my blue velvet couch I feel ludicrous relief. I’m finally home and get to put my toes up. But I’m also done with the process of buying the damn thing.
It was seriously brutal. Really, magnificently agonizing.
I mean, its just a couch, right?
Wrong. In fact, the whole thing reminded me a lot of what it's like to buy a home.
You get all these weird ideas in your head. I’m thinking my couch is going to tell people who I am. It would be a reflection of all my accomplishments and self worth wrapped up in a beautiful fabric covered frame.
I knew exactly what I wanted. It had to be really big to fill the entire living space. It was going to be where I entertain, nap, watch tv and eat. It had to be L-shaped, modern, and short enough that the top didn’t go over the sills of my oversized windows.
The problem? I found 27 couches that I wanted. All way over my budget.
It was clear that one thing was true: I didn’t have enough cash to buy the couch I really wanted. Even though I'm a grown adult. Well into my career. Working 50+ hour 7 day weeks. I’m still broke. I’m broke and yet I’m making pretty good income. I mean that makes no sense, and yet, it’s true.
I was stuck in this endless loop.
I had to have a certain couch to be happy. I deserved to be happy. But I couldn’t have the couch that would make me happy because I didn’t have enough money. I didn’t have enough money because I wasn’t selling enough real estate. And that must mean I was unsuccessful. A failure.
And if I couldn’t get a couch I wanted I would have to sit on my failures.
Every. Single. Day.
And the thing is, I’d feel guilty and ridiculous for caring so much about the stupid couch. But then I’d go back to feeling this deep disgusting desire for this perfect couch.
This went on for weeks. I was too stuck in my own emotions to take a step back.
I didn’t realize that I could have everything I wanted, but I just wasn’t seeing it clearly.
This reminds me of what I see my buyers going through when searching for a home. They start the home search with an idea of what they want, but they can’t afford it. It makes them feel angry, resentful, envious, sad, or even inadequate.
They get stuck in a hamster wheel that paralyzes them from moving forward.
Well, you see, I did eventually find a couch - a blue velvet L-shaped modern couch that doesn’t go above my window sill. It’s used, and imperfect, and I love it.
In fact, I love it even more than the 27 other couches I couldn’t afford. And it’s because I was able to step out of my loop and look at what I really wanted and what really mattered.
I wasted a lot of time and energy running in circles.
If I had asked the right questions at the very beginning, I would have spared myself a lot of pointless anguish.
And if I hadn’t ever asked the right questions, I would never have gotten the couch I wanted. Or I would have paid too much for a couch I really didn’t need.